Be a Good Audience Member

Nadira: This is a special “what happens in the Prius” edition of more than steps. I’m here with Kezmaya. She’s one of the students in my professional class, and she’s also the hostess of Open Zils, a weekly open mic with live music at the Athenian corner in Lowell, Massachusetts. So Kezmaya, can you tell us about what’s special about the Prius that we’re sitting in right now.

Kezmaya: Well this came about because well when you drive to dance event that are all over the New England area, and I would often bring friends with me and we would talk about performing and dancing and other things that were important to us, and it just kind of came about that the Prius became sort of a safe space where we could discuss these things. So the Prius is … Whatever we say in the Prius, stays in the Prius.

Nadira: But you are in the Prius with us right now, so this counts. Alright, so I asked Kezmaya to talk to us about being a good member of the belly dance audience, and as an event coordinator, this is something that she sees a lot. So Kezmaya, why is it important to be a supportive audience member?

Kezmaya: Well for performers, it makes a huge difference to have an audience that is giving energy back and makes it easier to perform, but also considering that in a lot of events, especially at open zils, there’s usually only a few dancers in an audience of restaurant goers, and the dancers need to model good behavior so other people know what to do.

Nadira: Now one thing to mention too is that especially when it comes to the effect on the dancer, is that in Arabic music theory, there’s actually a special official rule for the listener. The idea is that the music is not being just created by the musicians, but by everybody in the room, and that was considered so important, that when music was first being recorded, a lot of musicians would actually invite their favorite listeners to sit in the studio with them, so that they could do a better job. But also, it seems like being a good audience member is also good for your relationships in the dance community. As an event organizer, what do you think about that?

Kezmaya: Well it’s true. People who are supporting the dancers, who are engaging, who are enjoying what they’re doing, who are not creating drama, these are the kind of people who you enjoy having around and make it easy to run events, and you are going to enjoy having them as audience members and as performers. It’s helpful to have those kind of people around.

Nadira: It’s not just favoritism, these people get invited more often because they also make the event better for everybody. Alright, so as an event organizer, what are some of the bad behaviors from the dancers that should know better?

Kezmaya: Oh boy. There’s lots. It can run the gambit from staring at your phone when the performer’s performing, talking to your friends, laughing and talking, which can unfortunately get misinterpreted by performers, thinking that it’s the laughing is actually directed at them. If you are not actually smiling and giving positive energy, you might have that kind of blank look or not … That gets misinterpreted as judge-y face, which is really hard when you’re a performer. There’s all kinds of things.

Nadira: When I was a newer pro, my teacher had a student who had the crankiest resting face I have ever seen in my life. She would sit in the front row, and she would scowl at you through the whole performance, and it was like dancing for a black hole, and I remember that affecting me so much, thinking like … Did my costume slip, was I showing something bad? And afterwards she was like, oh I loved that performance, that was so great. And I brought it up to our teacher who said yeah, that’s just her resting face and she kept talking to her about it, and it never improved, and eventually she just forbade her to sit in the front row. Alright well, given that we all want to be a force for good, how can we do that? What goes into that?

Kezmaya: Well there’s a lot of things that you can do to be a good audience member to model this … Again like I said for the rest of the people who may not be familiar with this … Paying attention. Being engaged. Actually watching the performer. Most dancers enjoy watching other dancers, so let that show on your face. I mean, clap when it’s appropriate. Smile. Be an active audience member.

Nadira: Now one of the things that’s tough about smiling is that, sometimes you’re genuinely enjoying yourself, but especially in the long show, your face just gets tired. Do you have any tips for that?

Kezmaya: Well suggestions, drinking water periodically. Let your face muscles relax. Somethings you don’t always necessarily have to be smiling, but if you are watching it and thinking and actually enjoying the show, when thoughts run through your head, that gets mirrored on your face, so if you’re thinking things like oh my gosh that’s beautiful, or what a lovely move, that’s going to show on your face, so those positive things will be reflected back to the performer, and that’s really helpful.

Nadira: Two of my own favorites are the, ooh, tell me more look, which at least shows you’re interested, but doesn’t use the same muscles as smiling, so it feels lot more relaxed, and also the mm I like that. Mm-hmm. Those both give kind of a pleasantly relaxed look as opposed to active smiles but still look very engaged and very supportive. Alright, now given that we’re often dancing in a restaurant context, what helps us be good members of that audience?

Kezmaya: Well for open zils, where you have a band playing, some things that can be helpful, well for the band, is to remember that this is a dance band, they’re not there for background. So they’re playing things … Well first of all, listen to them they’re playing wonderful music, enjoy it. But they’re also playing things to be danced to. So again, dancers, we need to be the force that gets people doing things. So get up and dance to a song if you like it. Line dancing, feel free to join even if you don’t know it. You’ll pick it up pretty fast and you don’t have to be good, it’s just there to have fun.

Nadira: Another thing is that this is a business, so make sure you buy something. Earn your place that you’re taking up at the table.

Kezmaya: Exactly. The band gets paid through what gets people buying food and drink, so support the band by making sure you buy something there.

Nadira: And ditto for the staff.

Kezmaya: Yes absolutely. Dancers are notoriously difficult, because we get up and we run around and we do different things, and we’re really a challenge for wait staff, so show your appreciation there.

Nadira: Allright.

Kezmaya: And one more thing about the band, most of the time, if there’s something that you would like them to play, ask them for it. They love to be appreciated, and you asking for a song, that makes their day.

Nadira: Awesome. Alright. Now last thing we wanted to talk about is a little bit more in my wheelhouse, which is how teachers can help their students become better audience members. So my advice is first, tell your students that this is important. This never even occurs to so many of them unless we tell them. I recommend that you tell them why it’s important so that when they internalize that, they know why it’s worth spending their energy and attention on it. I recommend that you tell them all the specifics of how they can do that, so all the things that Kezmaya and I have just talked about. But one thing that really helps is to make them experience that difference. One thing that we did in class just last week, was we split the class into two groups, and we took turns with one group being the audience, and the other group being the dancer, and I asked the audience members to alternate between being enthusiastic and engaged, and being more passive or even judgemental, and the difference was huge. Did that feel different Kezmaya?

Kezmaya: Yes. You could really feel the difference between when you were getting that positive energy back, it was much easier and when it got turned off, all the sudden dancing became so much more an effort.

Nadira: And it was really a useful drill from two directions. One from the dancers getting some practice having a little bit more of a thick skin, which when you’re dancing for the public, you need, but more importantly it also helped us practice our good audience skills so that you are aware of the difference of what it feels like, and also what you need to be doing actively to be good. Related to that, you also need to encourage your students to actually practice this, whether it’s in class like we just did, or it’s just going to more events and spending some of your attention on that. And the most important thing is that until you are certain that you are being a force for good, do not sit in the front row. If you have a cranky resting face and it isn’t under control yet, sit in the back. If you think you’re getting there, but you’re not quite enthusiastic, or if you’re having a tough day and can’t really spend all that energy, sit in the middle maybe. The front row is really for folks who are willing to be active participants in the show. Alright well thank you so much Kezmaya, this has been awesome.

Kezmaya: Thank you.

Nadira: And I hope we will end up here in the Prius again soon.

Kezmaya: Yes.